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I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. -Mitch Hedberg

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Try, try, try, and keep on trying is the rule that must be followed to become an expert in anything.
The true delight is in the finding out rather than in the knowing.
Great discoveries and improvements invariably involve the cooperation of many minds.
You only have to do a very few things right in your life so long as you don't do too many things wrong. — Warren Buffett
You only have to do a very few things right in your life so long as you don't do too many things wrong. - Warren Buffett
Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.- Mitch Hedberg
Every problem contains the seed of it's own solution.
I would like to be the first man in the gym business to throw out my scale. If you don't like what you see in the mirror, what difference does it make what the scale says?
Our prevailing system of management has destroyed our people. People are born with intrinsic motivation, self-respect, dignity, curiosity to learn, joy in learning. The forces of destruction begin with toddlers - a prize for the best Halloween costume, grades in school, gold stars - and on up through the university. On the job people, teams, and divisions are ranked, reward for the top, punishment for the bottom. Management by Objectives, quotas, incentive pay, business plans, put together separately, division by division, cause further loss, unknown and unknowable. — W. Edwards Deming
My name is Sherlock Holmes. It is my business to know what other people do not know.