If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? ― Steven Wright

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In books we never find anything but ourselves. Strangely enough, that always gives us great pleasure, and we say the author is a genius.

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I shall work for the Republican party and call on all women to join me, precisely... for what that party has done and promises to do for women, nothing more, nothing less.

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Reading is everything. Reading makes me feel like I've accomplished something, learned something, become a better person. Reading makes me smarter. Reading gives me something to talk about later on. Reading is the unbelievably healthy way my attention deficit disorder medicates itself. Reading is escape, and the opposite of escape; it's a way to make contact with reality after a day of making things up, and it's a way of making contact with someone else's imagination after a day that's all too real. Reading is grist. Reading is bliss.

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Now is the accepted time, not tomorrow, not some more convenient season. It is today that our best work can be done.

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Books are a hard-bound drug with no danger of an overdose. I am the happy victim of books.

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You Don’t Tell Me Things, Joel. I’m An Open Book. I Tell You Everything, Every Damn, Embarrassing Thing. - Clementine To Joel

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There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. ― Steven Wright

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Books open your mind, broaden your mind, and strengthen you as nothing else can.

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As a child, my whole life was books. They were my fantasy. That's where I could go. That was a lot of times [what] saved me.

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