Drowned in a vat of whiskey... Oh Death, where is thy sting? ― W.C. Fields

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Don't be a luddy-duddy! Don't be a mooncalf! Don't be a jabbernowl! You're not those, are you? ― W.C. Fields

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What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch? ― W. C. Fields

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Never give a sucker an even break. ― W.C. Fields

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Children should neither be seen nor heard from – ever again. ― W. C. Fields

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Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night ― W.C. Fields

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Ain't fit for man nor beast ― W.C. Fields

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I train Monday through Saturday. I usually have fitness training for 90 minutes, then I'm on the tennis court for 3 to 4 hours. — Sloane Stephens

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To understand just one life you have to swallow the world ... do you wonder, then, that I was a heavy child?

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It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

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