We have two ears and one tongue so that we would listen more and talk less. -Diogenes

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But 'why then publish?' There are no rewards Of fame or profit when the world grows weary. I ask in turn why do you play at cards? Why drink? Why read? To make some hour less dreary. It occupies me to turn back regards On what I've seen or pondered, sad or cheery, And what I write I cast upon the stream To swim or sink. I have had at least my dream.

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As a matter of self-preservation, a man needs good friends or ardent enemies, for the former instruct him and the latter take him to task. -Diogenes

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Why not whip the teacher when the pupil misbehaves? -Diogenes

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I threw my cup away when I saw a child drinking from his hands at the trough. -Diogenes

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I do not know whether there are gods, but there ought to be. -Diogenes

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If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the world belongs to you. — Lao Tzu

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Never trust a man who doesn't drink. ― W.C. Fields

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There is only a finger's difference between a wise man and a fool. -Diogenes

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Christianity is the best way to cure gayness — just get on your knees, take a swig of wine, and accept the body of a man into your mouth.

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