I always remind people from outside our state that there’s plenty of room for all Alaska’s animals — right next to the mashed potatoes.

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I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick.

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Mr. President, the only thing that stops a bad guy with a nuke is a good guy with a nuke.

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We don't need to fundamentally transform America. We need to restore America.

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Waterboarding is how we baptize terrorists.

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Hope is not a strategy.

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We say keep your change, we'll keep our God, our guns, our constitution.

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How do you know there’s not a door to heaven in the sky between Malaysia and Vietnam?

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Polls? Nah... they're for strippers and cross country skiers.

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Rain is something the democrats use to sell umbrellas.

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