#Quote
More Quotes by Stephen Colbert
Thirty seconds is the exact amount of time Americans can tolerate something they don't understand.
Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit to stupidity.
Sixty eight percent of Republicans don't believe in evolution. On the other hand, only five percent of monkeys believe in Republicans.
Don't cry over spilled milk. By this time tomorrow, it'll be free yogurt.
If Jesus doesn't have a sense of humor, I am in huge trouble.
It is a well known fact that reality has liberal bias.
The fate of our country is now in the hands of people who don't think about what they want until they get right up to the register at McDonald's.
There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good.
Global warming isn't real because I was cold today! Also great news: world hunger is over because I just ate.
An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.
