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More Quotes by Tina Fey
You've got to experience failure to understand that you can survive it.
If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?”
Now every girl is expected to have: Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.
If you ever start to feel good about yourself... .... they have this thing called the internet.
A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss.
Don’t waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions; go over, under, through, and opinions will change organically when you’re the boss. Or they won’t. Who cares? Do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.
Everybody kind of gets to be the person they didn't get to be.
Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.
Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue.
Life is improvisation.
