Among other things I think humor is a shield, a weapon, a survival kit. So here we are several billion of us, crowded into our global concentration camp for the duration. How are we to survive? Solemnity is not the answer, any more than witless and irresponsible frivolity is. I think our best chance lies in humor, which in this case means a wry acceptance of our predicament. We don't have to like it but we can at least recognize its ridiculous aspects, one of which is ourselves.

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Senescence begins And middle-age ends The day your descendants Outnumber your friends

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Wind is caused by the trees waving their branches.

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A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

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I am a conscientious man, when I throw rocks at seabirds I leave no tern unstoned.

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Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

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I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.

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I believe that people believe what they believe they believe.

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Middle-age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

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Celery, raw, Develops the jaw

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