Did you ever see the customers in health - food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half - dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They're dying, of course, but they look terrific.

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I wasn't always black... there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger.

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It isn't a matter of black is beautiful as much as it is white is not all that's beautiful.

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Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them.

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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

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Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

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Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.

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The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.

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